As we browse the Internet and tour sales centers, we still see several developers using the old "Why rent when you can own?" argument to market their homes. It's time for something new.

If ads and Web sites tell us anything, it's that buyers want to belong. How can they fit in with their peers and co-workers if they aren't participating in the defining tragedy of their generation: being stuck with a new condo in the middle of an economic crisis?

All the cool kids are griping about mortgages and facing foreclosures, while renters are stuck on the sidelines, unable to jump into the conversation or one-up their buddies with their own tales of woe.

It's no longer sufficient to suggest that buyers will get into swanky night-spots or down martinis with beautiful neighbors simply by signing on the dotted line. They need to know that by foregoing a rental lifestyle, they can join an exclusive group of sufferers.

To that end, we propose this: Ditch "Why rent when you can own?" and get with…

"Why rent when you can moan?"

What do you say?

You've got to laugh to keep from crying, Yo readers. That's why we're celebrating "Gallows Humor Weekend" at YoChicago. Think of it as our own real-estate-themed prelude to Halloween.

To get things rolling, we'll pass along this hot-off-the-presses news release:

Coming Soon…

We're delighted to announce a GRAND OPENING WING DING for…

TRAMP TOWER

Blair Kamin says: “Wee doggies, they got a pen'house an' one o' them tables what got a umbrella!”

Featuring:

• All surface-mounted wiring
• "Indoors" outhouse
• Kustum Kitchens by Possumbility
• Passive solar heating & cooling
• Vintage wind generator
• Highly sustainable environment for native species
• Enjoy sustainable, locally produced dietary regimen of tasty local critters
• Low population density affords easy supply of road kill
• Porches, decks and stairwells mostly in compliance with OSHA standards

The comment section is all yours, boys and ghouls!

We've all seen the headlines: Springfield's pending transit solution is now wrapped up in a rather hefty increase in the state's real estate transfer tax. The bump could be as much as 40 percent, according to today's Trib article.

In a comment on a previous entry, Dmac called the move "disgraceful" and questioned why the state was heaping abuse on "part of our economy that's already taken a beating."

What do you think? Is the transfer tax bump the right choice for a reliable transit solution? Or will homebuyers respond by steering clear of a market that's already rife with deals?

"It's interesting that the old diverse Uptown is purely listed as 'emerging high-income.' I've heard people say that Uptown and Rogers Park have sort of switched places over the years in terms of crime and poverty. Could this be true?"

– Uptown R commenting on our post about a new report measuring income diversity in Chicago's 77 official community areas.

"I still maintain that we are not a land starved city. I am not talking about chewing up farmland. You know very well how many empty lots there are all around the city. Do you not agree that it would be better to start filling those up before demolishing historic buildings?"

- Anon, commenting on a story we ripped from the Beachwood Reporter regarding the ongoing battle over the proposed demolition of the Lake Shore Athletic Club

"My clients really enjoy the place…City Builders have had several other developments in the area and seem to be responsive."

- Eric Rojas, making that rare compliment to a developer

"In terms of the parking, the new Aldi is street friendly. In terms of creating a pedestrian-friendly street it ain't. Notice how the entrance is actually in the back of the store. The original renderings show the entrance in the front…This is a problem because many, possibly most, of the people who will shop there will be pedestrians."

– Irish Pirate commenting on our post about the design of a new Aldi store in Uptown, at 4500 N Broadway St.

The median price increase simply indicates that the bottom has dropped out of the market. Nobody can afford the cheap stuff anymore and it has stopped selling.

The people with actual money and credit can still afford to pay X dollars for a place to live. And they are continuing to do so, albeit in smaller numbers. Lucky them, they're getting more home for X dollars than they were a year ago.

Rest assured, prices and sales are dropping. The median price change is only indicating a shift in the type of sales that still occur."

- Renter guy, commenting on our post about rising market times and prices in Chicago.

Maybe someone will come up with a rival project called the "Rocker" condos. For those unfamiliar with 1960s British culture, the "Mods" were upscale youths who wore Carnaby Street high fashion and favored the Beatles and other Liverpool bands, while the "Rockers" were working-class kids with a penchant for biker gear and the Stones/Animals/Who.

- Oldster, commenting on our post about Mod, a condo project planned in the West Loop

"You'd be crazy to pay this much for ANYTHING in the Edgewater ghetto."

"Why would someone build this in the ghetto neighborhood known as Humboldt Park? No matter how you dress it up, this neighborhood is not and will never be hot."

– The first is Jane's comment on our post about an Edgewater condo for less than $400,000, and the second is Jane's take on Humboldt Park in response to our post on an artist's loft there.

Any guesses on where Jane lives? Hello, Jane - are you there? Readers want to know which neighborhoods are up to your standards.